YOU ! Yes, you. It’s okay, we are all here for the same reason and there is nothing shameful about it. Most people think maintaining a relationship with your counterpart in college is actually tougher than college itself, and they are not wrong. Letting go of those formative school days and jumping into the college dating scene can be a mentally stressful chapter in one’s life. Well, you’re in luck.
The first thoughts that come to one’s mind when thinking about college are parties, schoolwork and romance. Whether it is your first college kiss or last college relationship, there are memories attached to them which you take to the grave. Regardless of whether
you are knee-deep in a relationship or looking for something casual, getting some college dating advice could make a significant difference in how you traverse this complex environment.
1. Opening up your Friend Circle
Getting nagged by the bois/girls that all you do is spend time with your girlfriend/boyfriend? More often than not, they do have a point. You don’t want to be that person who is always seen with your significant other 24/7 around college – Unleash the social butterfly within you and open up that circle. Whether you want him/her to be a part of that circle to reduce those prying eyes is entirely up to you.
2. Make sure both of you want the same thing
The worst response you can get from your love interest is “Sorry I am not looking for anything serious right now”. To avoid the embarrassment and heartbreak, make sure both of you are on the same page in terms of what y’all are looking for. Although most people in college are looking to have fun without any strings attached, there are still a handful looking for that deep emotional connection too. If it is just a FWB or hook-up, then nights out and parties are the way to go. If you are looking for something more, it can get a little more complicated as you need it to “click” with the person. For this, resorting to apps like Tinder and Bumble or joining extra-curricular activities such as clubs to meet people with similar interests might be the lane you’d want to take.
3. Real eyes, Realize, Real lies
Want to keep your personal life under covers? Don’t want people to know that you and him/her are together? I have some bad news for you, keeping a relationship secret in college is like keeping your marks hidden from friends. One cliché about college life is that news and gossip spreads like wildfire. The words “Don’t tell anyone this, but…..” means something to only a few sensible people. So save yourself all the lies and acting, open up about your relationship and don’t be ashamed about it. If you are worried about people getting awkward around ya’ll, refer to point no.1 and things should work out. Be proud of your relationship.
4. Know when to Inhale the Future, Exhale the Past
Easier said than done, right? College relationships/flings, no matter how smoothly they are going, always tend to hit a brick wall at some point. Once they do, it is both your jobs collectively to either break it down together or move around it in your own separate ways. It can be a daunting process, especially if one of you was more invested than the other. Feeling that a relationship is one-sided is completely normal – Just know when to hit the brakes once confrontation is no longer an option. It may take a toll on you, and this is why it is extremely important that you love YOURSELF before you start loving someone else. So keep your chin up, and be smart enough to not let people take you for a ride.
5. Comparison is the Thief of Joy!
Being surrounded with couples for 3 years, one thing I know for certain is All that Glitters is not Gold. If you have friends that are in healthier relationships than yourself, good for them. You never know what is going on behind closed doors hence envying what you don’t have is a waste of time. Not to mention the mess it can create in your own relationship.
6. Being Single is not a lack of options – It’s a choice
This may come as a surprise to many but being single is completely cool! Some people are lone rangers and don’t feel the need to be committed as yet. Being in a relationship is not a status symbol which is a common misconception amongst college students. Lucky for you, I am here to tell you it is really not. Enjoying a large pizza yourself on a Saturday night is more fun than you think.
AND VOILA! You are now one step closer to being a College Love Guru. Humans are complicated creatures and it is going to take more than a blog post for you to have your perfect love life in college. Well, at least you got started somewhere.